Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Bad Dreams

Often when Derreck is gone to work for his two weeks, I don't sleep well. Sometimes I do, but mostly I don't. This time seems a little worse than normal though. I am a very light sleeper. I hear almost everything. Before the kids came our dogs would sleep in front of our bedroom window. If for some reason I sleep in living room, they would sleep in front of the living room windows. But since the kids are here, the dogs could care less about me! They are now sleeping at the front of the house (when they sleep) by the kids windows. These dogs give me comfort in knowing that they are going to give me a heads up on anything that comes into our yard, especially at night.

I know if something is going to happen there is nothing that I can do except PRAY. I can't change my future, only God can. HE has a plan for the things that happen in my life. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." He knows what He is doing! HE's been doing it since the beginning of time!

Last night I had a dream. I weird dream. We had some people over who were mostly family. Everyone was going and coming inside the house, but for some reason I never went outside. I was cleaning and minding my own business. Well, I went to go put up some laundry in our bedroom and I could hear everyone talking.

I heard my brother teaching all the kids how to sacrifice animals correctly and that they had to make sure they did it to Satan or they would be punished. He also told them that it needed to be done in our yard until we joined them. Well then! I couldn't get out side to stop him. Derreck was outside but not paying attention.

Now don't get me wrong. My brother (as far as I know) is not a Satan worshipper. I know he believes in God, but I also know he hasn't fully committed his life TO God yet. Would he teach his kids something like that?  Some parents do, and I would be stupid to believe that he absolutely wouldn't. I love his kids like they were  my own. I don't want them to be taught anything but the whole truth of Jesus. Deuteronomy 6:7 says "And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up."

We have to teach our kids about Jesus. Everything that we do should be about Jesus. We have to show them that we fear God, and His mighty power. It broke my heart to know that my brother was trying to teach all the kids about these things, and the fact that it was my brother and not a stranger hurt even worse.

Another part of my dream was that "S" had came inside and found me and started pushing yelling at me. Now then! I absolutely will not tolerate a child ruling over their parents (in any way)! So I grabbed her by her arm, pulled her to her room, and pushed her in. I also slammed the door.

I don't want "S" to be this way. I pray that she learns how to have the fruit of the Spirit. Galatians 5:22-23 lists them: "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law." I also know that I have to model these on front of her and her brothers, in order for them to learn about them.

The worst part of my dream was what I saw when I got back to our room. The curtains were wide open, so I could see everything going on outside. Derreck was outside hanging out with a woman whom I had never seen before. Very inappropriately hanging out with her. It was horrible. I just stood there and looked with tears pouring down my face.

I have never once doubted my husband when it comes to faithfulness. I am not in any way doubting him now. When you have a relationship where one person is gone for 1/2 the year, either you trust them or it's not going to work out. Even when my husband wasn't walking with the Lord I still trusted him, so I am not saying that he is cheating on me or anything like that.

Women who are looking to find good men are out there. They envy a marriage that is happy, so they will do anything to seek and destroy it. Proverbs 5:3 says, "For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil:". I as a wife need to realize that and pay attention to my husbands needs and his desires. The less I do these things the more likely he would be willing to seek out someone else to fulfill them.

Now I am not a dream reader or anything like that. But I do know that this dream wasn't to tell me that this is things that these people are doing. It's things that I need to protect our house from. I need to pray without ceasing and I need to teach the truth according to the Bible. Satan is real! He wants control over everything in our lives. He wants our marriages, he wants our children now and in the future, and he wants us. I have been seeing this verse every where but it has real meaning to me now.

"Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour"
1 Peter 5:7-8

Thank you God for the wake up call!

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